What Are You Thinking?

by Mark Ivar Myhre on December 20, 2007

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Those thoughts in your head may not be your own.

They might be coming from another part of you – an aspect of yourself that may not have your best interest at heart.

I’m talking about your ego.

I’ve written about the ego before, in the e-books on forgiving yourself and creating your own reality, and in this previous post about the ego.

Here’s the briefest of synopses:

What your ego is: Your information delivery system. Like a mailman.

Why it ‘goes bad’: Because we force it to be responsible for things it can’t be responsible for. We force it to make choices and decisions about life, for example. (It’s called ‘shaming the ego’.)



Today, I’d like to expand on the ego a little bit, and explain why it’s so critically important to learn to differentiate between your thoughts and feelings, and your ego’s thoughts and feelings.

Ego, by it’s very nature, really isn’t very smart. But it’s important to understand: your ego does think and feel independently of you.

It can and does make choices and decisions quite independently of your choices and decisions.

And many people function from a place of ego rather than from their own self.

I know this can be a hard concept to grasp. And I also know from studying my own web site statistics, that many people don’t even want to read about the topic.

Well, the more joyful and successful and wonderful your life is, the less you’re functioning from a place of ego.



And the more misery you feel, the more you ARE functioning from a place of ego. A life run by ego is guaranteed to be a miserable life.

Because the ego is not equipped to run a life!

It is only equipped to deliver information – FROM the world and TO you. And to deliver your response back to the world.

Your ego is a ‘middleman’.

It must be there, for your very survival and existence. You NEED your ego.

But you need to be running the show! You need to be the one consciously making the choices and decisions.

So how do you know if it’s you or your ego doing the thinking and so forth?

Discernment. You learn to tell the difference. Here’s how to start:

Say you’re walking down the street and you see a red car. Your ego is supposed to say: “There’s a red car.”

Instead, what you hear is: “There’s a red car. I hate red cars!! They should all be rounded up and crushed into scrap metal. Look at that jerk driving. Boy, I’d like to…”

Or – you feel miserable emotionally. Your ego is supposed to say: “I’m feeling miserable right now.”

Period.

But what you hear: “I’m feeling miserable right now. I ALWAYS feel miserable. I’m just a miserable person. I’m bet everyone hates me. I’m a pathetic loser. I’ll never feel better. I should just do the whole world a favor and…”

You see what’s going on here. Rather than simply doing its job – delivering the facts – your ego also interprets the facts.



But that’s your job!

When you don’t take the time to consciously think and feel and make choices and decisions out of your thinking and feeling, you can be sure your ego is doing it for you.

If you want to blame, or avoid, or get righteous, or feel pity – or any of the other ways to go to sleep – someone still has to sit in the driver’s seat of your life.

It can be your inner child or some other aspect of you. But usually it’s your ego.

Here’s what I suggest:

Start by questioning every thought you can:

  • Is that me? Or is that my ego?
  • Do I really believe what I just thought?
  • Is this a thought that separates me?
  • Does it make me feel better-than or less-than?
  • Is it hurtful – to me or another?

These are the kinds of questions you want to ask yourself concerning the thoughts that pop up.

Basically, your ego wants to separate and punish and go to extremes of black and white. Those are the general tendencies.

By questioning your thoughts, you’re becoming more conscious and more powerful and more responsible and better equipped to function in life.

And it’s a good way to start becoming more of a friend to yourself.

all the best,

Mark

Mark Ivar Myhre
The Emotional Healing Coach
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