Do You Give Your Power Away?

by Mark Ivar Myhre on September 23, 2009

One of the biggest problems I see with people is that they keep giving their power away to the events and circumstances and other people in their environment.

There are endless ways to give your power away, but the end result is always the same. Namely, you end up powerless and frustrated and resentful; and usually end up blaming someone or something for your predicament. Sometimes you blame yourself.

Because the problem is so pervasive and so common, I’m willing to bet you’ve given a good bit of your power away right now – today – to some outside force that’s out of your control.

It could be your spouse or other loved one, since we often project onto those closest to us.

It could be a co-worker, a boss, or a neighbor. Or a casual acquaintance you can’t stop thinking about.

It could be your job or some other activity you engage in.

Or it could be worldly events you only read about or watch on the news.

It could be a problem inside – a personal problem no one else even knows about. It could be depression or anxiety or shame or self pity or judgments.

Basically, it could be ANYthing.

But I’m willing to bet it’s something.

Because we all do it. Heck, I do it myself all the time. And I KNOW about this stuff! I still have to catch myself and say, “Mark! What are DOING?!!”

And it’s robbing me.

When I give my power away, it’s like I’m opening up my wallet and throwing money away.

Now, no one else is USING my power. No one’s using it against me. No one even CAN use it, unless I let them. So it’s not like I’m in danger from others when I give them my power.

Nope, it’s just wasted. Which is bad enough.

Because I’ve got things I want to do; goals I want to accomplish. Shoot, I’ve got chores to do around the house! I NEED my power.

And it frustrates the heck out of me when I catch myself giving my power away.

When I spend too much time thinking and feeling about something…

When I blame ANY body or ANY thing…

When I say I can’t do something…

When I say I can’t change until ‘such-and-such’ happens…

Then I’m giving my power away.

And these are just a few of many, many examples of how we give our power away.

Okay, enough about the problem. What’s the solution?

Well, just being aware of all this can help. Why not stop for a minute right now and think about what’s bugging you, what’s keeping you up at night, what’s CAPTURED your attention?

Perhaps you’ve never given any thought to the fact you’re giving your power away to this object of your focus, but you are. And that’s NOT an indictment against you! It’s merely an observation.

See, if you can just change your perspective a little bit, you might be able to shed some new light on this issue.

Take a good hard look at HOW you’re giving your power away to this circumstance or person. Do you blame them? Are you waiting for them to change before you can change? Do you feel helpless… out of control?

The first step is to look at the ‘how’ – the specific steps or thoughts or actions you’re doing that cause your power to leak away. And admit it to yourself. Not to beat yourself up, but to honestly look at what you’re doing.

Remember, EVERY one is doing this!

It’s not just me and you.

But you and I may be the only ones to actually DO something about it. (Hey, somebody’s got to take the lead.)

So the first step is to simply hold your thoughts and feelings and actions up to the light of day. Don’t sweep what you’re doing under the rug. Be an adult. Tell yourself the truth.

Once you’ve got a handle on what you’re doing to give your power away, then you want to sit down and work on taking your power BACK. And believe me, if you could give it away, then you can take it back!

You take your power back by deliberately intending to. Find a quiet time and place when you can be with yourself. Focus on your problem or issue. Visualize it as vividly as you can. Create an image.

Now you want to encapsulate your image. Meaning, see it as ‘small and manageable’. I would suggest shrinking it down to the size of a basketball or baseball. Something you could hold in your hands.

See yourself holding this image in your hands. Sense its energy. FEEL it as fully and completely as you can.

Now, forcefully say “I TAKE MY POWER BACK FROM YOU” or some similar phrase. And imagine an unseen (or even seen, for that matter) energy moving from the image into you.

That’s basically it. You may need to repeat the exercise for maximum effectiveness.

Now, is this going to end the problem? Usually not, although it is possible. Most likely, though, it will give you a new perspective, a new attitude, a new sense of what to do.

It empowers you so you’re better equipped to handle the problem. It helps you see options and solutions that were hidden from view when you had given your power away.

It can also be a very liberating experience.

The next step involves taking a ‘power reading’ of where you’re at RIGHT NOW. And I’ll be speaking a lot more about that later. It’s a wonderfully simple technique I’ve recorded onto an audio file.

(Warning: Get ready for a sales pitch here…!)

It’s one small part of the complete audio program I’ve put together, based on the e-book How To Create Your Own Reality. I’ve recorded over SIX HOURS of life-changing information onto 26 audio files, that can either be downloaded or streamed from the internet.

At first, I thought I would simply read and record the e-book, but once I started I realized I’ve learned quite a bit since I last edited the e-book, and so this is like a whole NEW edition.

I’ve recorded quite a bit of new information I’ve never talked about before, and as far as I know, no one else has ever talked about it either.

It’s almost ready, and if you’ve already ordered a copy of the e-book, then you’ll have the opportunity to buy these audio files for ONE dollar each.

The few people who’ve listened to these audio files LOVED them. I think you will too.

I’ll keep you posted as to when they’re available.


Dottie January 11, 2010 at 3:18 pm

Dear Mark: I just realized what my problem was yesterday. I have to deal with a person who continually gets in my face and pushes me to the wall all the time. He is one of the few people who does this to me and I realized I was afraid of him and as “stupid” as he made me feel. Untill I realized he loves confrontations and was angry that I had received a position over him even though he had more experience in one aspect of this job. Since we donate our time to a spiritual path, I’m assuming everyone is grown up and “nice”. But not the case. Then I read this article while researching what do do because I realized I was “giving my power away to this person” and yes, that made me angry at myself. I don’t back down from many people and most people consider me “assertive”, but since he attacks my intelligence, that’s my sticking point. As a child, I was told all the time I was stupid, I didn’t realize until my boss told me when iwas 35 he hired me because I was smart! HA, I almost died laughing. Thanks for the insights,


Catherine Rondeau May 11, 2010 at 10:35 pm

Hi Mark,

I have been reading as much as your work as I can before we “meet”. What occurred to me as I read this was what I was thinking as I read. I was simultaneously thinking, “Oh but what if Mark can’t help?”, “What then?” You see, after 25-30 years of trying to piece it all together, I know these words. And yet, I wonder, will you be the person who has the magic “word” that is powerful enough to break through. The only thing that is keeping me from fleeing is the candor in your writing and the fact that you had the courage to acknowledge the bipolar stuff. That and the polar bear….

Patrina Howard July 10, 2010 at 2:57 pm

Hi Mark, your articles really resonate with me. You write with such understanding and compassion. I have your Emotional Healing Guide and refer to this often.
I subscribe to the widely held belief that even though we are living in such a technologically advanced age yet there is so much more misery and unhappiness that something is definately out of kilter. People don’t communicate any more, the very base instinct of a human being is to “belong” and we are all running around like demented rats on a wheel. I’ll stop right here before I go into “ramble” mode.
You are doing a brilliant job and I for one immensely appreciate it.
Kind regards,

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