“How Can I Better Control My Subconscious?”
It seems the questioner who asked me this had read some books which said that the subconscious controls much in our lives. So the obvious solution seems to be to take back control of that controlling subconscious! Since, um, we’re not too happy with our lives… I suppose…
And if we can just control our subconscious, things would improve.
First, what is the subconscious, exactly? Well, it’s a part of our mind. It’s way more conscious than our conscious mind. It knows infinitely more than we do. Here’s the analogy I like to use:
Imagine you’re standing on the top of a great mountain – the biggest mountain in the world. The ‘you’ standing on the mountain is the conscious mind, while the mountain itself is the subconscious. (And the rest of the earth? That’s your unconscious mind. Which is way more vast than even the subconscious.) Anyway, I give this analogy to put things in perspective.
Your subconscious can be your greatest ally, or can seem like your cruelest adversary. For the most part, it depends upon how the first five or six years of your life went. If you had the ‘perfect childhood’ (if that’s even possible!) then you will naturally find yourself living a happy, successful life. And you’ll probably never even give a thought to your subconscious or how to control it.
Your subconscious mind sets the parameters for how you’ll live the rest of your life. You start out as a blank slate, more or less, and start soaking up information from day one – if not earlier – about ‘how the world is’. You form your beliefs, and then your attitudes. You form your behavior patterns.
And you need to do this to survive! You can’t afford to re-learn how to tie your shoe every morning. You need a schema (a plan, essentially) for tying your shoe. So you don’t have to stop and think about it. Actually, we end up forming schemata for just about everything in our lives.
The problems come in when we don’t have that perfect childhood. For example, we can end up forming beliefs about love that include pain. We can form beliefs about success that include struggle. And we can form beliefs about health that include suffering.
And keep in mind, all this time, the subconscious is just doing the job it was designed to do. It sets the parameters early in life, so we can now live our life. It sets the boundaries. It sets the possibilities: what’s possible, and what’s impossible.
Another attribute of the subconscious is that it always seeks consistency. Everything must fit in with what we already believe, or it usually gets rejected. Or, on occasion, we form new beliefs – perhaps based on overwhelming data or perhaps based simply on preference.
Our willingness to form new beliefs directly correlates with how much intensity holds the old beliefs in place. The greater the intensity that surrounds the old beliefs, the less likely we are to change them. Unsurprisingly, this is where most of the problems arise, and this is why we can end up searching for ways to control our subconscious.
Beliefs can become like receptacles to hold the pain we didn’t or couldn’t or wouldn’t feel. And since we don’t want to feel that pain now, either, we tend to stay far away from those beliefs. We try not to even brush up against the belief; and if we do, we tend to back away quickly.
This is how our internal prisons form. This is how people become fanatics. How they become delusional…
For example, I ‘know’ all women are a certain way, because I have a set of painful beliefs that tell me so. Likewise, all men are a certain way. How do I know this is true? NOT because I’ve examined my beliefs about men or women – and found them to be true. I couldn’t possibly do that, because there’s too much pain around those beliefs.
No, I know my statements are true because I create all men or all women acting this certain way that validates my beliefs. My beliefs create my reality. (Along with other factors, of course.)
You see how it works? First, I have my early childhood experiences out of which I form my beliefs. Then, I use those beliefs to create the patterns for the rest of my life. Five years to set the patterns and programs. Eighty years to play them out.
Up till now I’ve just mentioned basic information that you probably already knew. Nothing earth-shattering here. The question is, what are we gonna do about it? (Assuming you didn’t live that perfect childhood….!)
Keep in mind that your subconscious never makes choices. It can only follow the programming. You are the one who makes the choices! But if you don’t like making choices, then your ego will have to make the choices in your life. Or your inner child. Or your inner victim. Or your inner martyr. That’s when life really starts to suck, and you feel compelled to find ways to control your subconscious.
The solution really boils down to making more choices. Making conscious choices. Making powerful choices. Making willed choices. And making right choices. (Yes, there are right choices and wrong choices.) I talk about this more in the e-book How To Create Your Own Reality.
Choice alone can override any and all beliefs and programming that exist in your subconscious mind. Choice! But your choices must have some muscle behind them. Again, I talk about this in the e-book. However, lets say you want to work directly with (not control!) your subconscious mind.
An excellent way to start is by changing your beliefs. I outline the whole procedure in How To Create Your Own Reality. It also includes a guided meditation that takes you to your subconscious and walks you through the whole process. It’s a fascinating experience to actually go to your subconscious mind and walk around it.
Now keep in mind, the beliefs you want to change will almost assuredly be cloaked in pain or some type of ‘unpleasant’ emotion. But if you’re willing to simply feel the pain or emotion – and release it – then you’ll be well-equipped to change the belief. And you’ll be raising your resonance at the same time! A true win-win situation.
Plus, your world will change as a result. It has too. It has no choice. It might change a little, or it might change a lot. Just depends upon how much intensity you feel and release, and how much impact the belief was having in your life to begin with. (And how much you’re willing to change. And how much you choose to let in the change. And… okay, I guess it does get a little complicated…!)
And you might want to note, nowhere do I talk about ‘controlling’ your subconscious. This is about working with your subconscious. Controlling your subconscious makes about as much sense as controlling your computer. Or trying to control the wind, for that matter.
Remember, your subconscious mind is an ally, not an enemy. There’s no need to try to control it. Besides, control always leads to stagnation and destruction. It’s the complete opposite of conscious reality creation. Control stymies your creation efforts.
And finally, keep in mind your subconscious speaks the language of feeling and imagination. The closest thing to compare it to is the dream state. When you’re dreaming, you’re working with your imagination and your emotion. Same here. To get an idea of how your subconscious functions, just think about how you dream.
The goal is to bring choice to the dream. Bring choice to the subconscious. That way you can change the beliefs and the programming.
But if you try to avoid making choices, you’ll always be at sufferance not only to your subconscious, but to all those ‘lesser’ parts of you as well, such as your ego, your inner child, your inner adolescent, and the many others.
Ultimately, choice overrides everything else. Or it can… if you’re making powerful choices.all the best,
Mark Ivar Myhre
The Emotional Healing Coach
Want to talk about it? Click here
Uh, you are on my email list, right? If not, Click Here right away to get connected to all kinds of cool stuff.
Bookmark & Share
Please rate this page by clicking on one of the links below.